Nov 27, 2019

15 Details Every Couple Forgets On Wedding Day

During a recent wedding, a venue owner and I were just sort of chatting and reviewing how the night was going. Something trivial had been forgotten, and we were reflecting on how the same sorts of things are generally forgotten. She suggested we do a video on our YouTube channel to help future clients remember those typically forgotten items. Thank you to Jessica Walker over at Felicity Church for the idea behind this blog and the video on the same topic.

Why So Forgetful?

Let’s start with why weddings make people forget so much. These lapses in memory are so common, that as a general rule, I expect my couples to remember little to nothing logistical on the wedding day. We’ve got smart, successful, conscientious clients, so why do I assume they can’t keep up with timelines and details on the wedding day?

Experience Says So

Well, experience for one. If a bride or anyone emotionally involved in the day tells me, I’ll bring the cake knife to the wedding, I always bring an extra. If they say I’ll be there at noon to drop something off, I get their cell phone number. Because the past has taught me that brides, grooms, their parents, or even the maid of honor or best man are very unlikely to remember smaller details on the wedding day.

The issue isn’t that you don’t care about the details, the issue is they just don’t matter as much as the fact that you’re getting married! The fact that you or your daughter or son, or best friend are getting married is going to distract you from anything less important.

It’s Like Forgetting What You Went into the Kitchen for

It’s like when you are going to the kitchen to get your coffee, then you’re like “Wait why am I in here?” Then 2 hours later you realize the coffee is still on the pot.  What happened? Well probably something of higher priority came up, distracted you and you forgot about the coffee altogether. Maybe you got a work call, your mom stopped by, your fiancé needed you for something, your dog started barking at a stranger at the door, maybe you remembered something you had to do for your wedding. Something broke your focus and stopped you from remembering the coffee. At that moment, the coffee wasn’t a priority.

What if You Forget to Remember your Wedding Day

Forgetting to bring the cake knife is no big thing.  This is a low priority. The easy solution for this is to prepare in advance and delegate every trivial responsibility that you would have on the wedding day to someone you trust. Again, not someone who is emotionally involved with the wedding, because they’ll probably forget too. It’s hard to let go of these details, but its easier when you focus on what you are making room for!

Let’s talk about what happens if you DO let logistics and details interfere with your ability to be present for your day. If you forget to take in how your best friend showed up early with your favorite coffee, how your fiancé sent over the perfect gift, what your mom looked like today, how your dad looked at you when he saw you in the dress. What if you are distracted from those precious moments with your fiancé. If you’re distracted its likely that you won’t be able to recall these moments.

Make Room Mentally

Start now to make room mentally for your wedding day. Limit the distractions and start to rehearse how you will be present on the wedding day. How you will leave your cell phone with someone else, how you will gently refocus your mind when it wanders off the actual day.

The 15 things our clients most frequently forget on the wedding day

So without further adieu, here it is, the list you came here for! Though I hope the preface was worth reading first!

  1. To help with the bustle or how to bustle it (Suggested by Heather Schwaner, Lead Coordinator)

  2. Cake Server and Knife, toasting flutes

  3. Final balances and the wedding pro comes to me looking for it (Suggested by Amelie Pizza, Lead Coordinator)

  4. Ties or Bow Ties

  5. Writing vows, or just forgetting where they put their vows (Suggested by Alexis Nelson, Lead Coordinator)

  6. Garters either entirely, or at the getting ready location (Suggested by Amelie Pizza, Lead Coordinator)

  7. Overnight bag for the wedding night (this is mostly grooms) (Suggested by Amelie Pizza, Lead Coordinator)

  8. Pens for the sign in the item (Suggested by Natalie Atkinson, Lead Coordinator)

  9. ID’s for after-parties (brides ID I mean because the groom normally has his wallet) (Suggested by Amelie Pizza, Lead Coordinator)

  10. Marriage license or the supporting documents to get it. (Suggested by Janet Howell, Lead Coordinator)

  11. Forgetting belongings in the honeymoon suite.  Eek! bridesmaid ALWAYS leave their things at the getting ready location then the hotel room is vacant OR where the bride is staying and knocking on the door at 2 am after a night out (Suggested by Janet Howell, Lead Coordinator)

  12. Contact lens case, contact solution (Suggested by Janet Howell, Lead Coordinator)

  13. Special items for detail photos like perfume or invitation suite. (Suggested by Amelia Jeanmarie, Lead Coordinator)

  14. Shoes, lately its been our Mother of the Brides that have been forgetting their shoes!

  15. Water




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